Delirium

On the Fourth of July, Lena goes to Hana’s house, expecting them to have a traditional holiday of food and fireworks at the promenade. However, when she arrives, Hana is listening to strange music that is not approved by the government, which controls intranet use and all available books, music, and movies. Hana explains that she met someone who codes intranet restrictions and detects illegal websites; he showed her how to find them online. These sites are run by citizens who disagree with the cure and post their opinions, music, and messages in opposition to the government. Hana is delighted by what she has discovered, but Lena fears that Hana’s more open rebellion is making her a stranger to Lena. Hana tells Lena about a secret party that night, and they argue about whether or not to attend. Hana criticizes Lena for being afraid, and Lena believes that Hana can never understand her fears because Hana is wealthy and has both of her parents. When Hana reassures Lena that she is nothing like her mother, Lena angrily storms out and cries all the way home.

Lena recalls her childhood with her mother: a time filled with secret singing and dancing. She now believes that her mother’s behavior was “freakish” because of the disease of love (115). This section also reveals that Lena’s father died of cancer when she was an infant. Despite her anxiety, Lena decides to go to the secret party to show Hana that she was wrong about not being like her mother; even though Hana meant this in a kind way, Lena feels that she has something to prove. The party is at an abandoned government farm. There is a live band playing music Lena has never heard but that she finds enthralling. She is also shocked to see that uncured boys and girls are dancing, touching, and drinking together. Hana, who is drinking with a boy, is happily surprised to see Lena.

Lena is overwhelmed by it all and tries to run away but is stopped by Alex. He jokingly accuses Lena of standing him up at the beach weeks ago. He also explains that he snuck into the labs on evaluation day to get coffee but was frightened by the oncoming herd of cows and coincidentally ended up hiding in the observation deck during Lena’s evaluation. Lena is both relieved and disappointed that he does not seem as mysterious as she assumed. Alex also reveals that he saw Lena and Hana once before as they ran past a coffee shop where he used to work several months ago. He relates that at that time, he noticed Lena jumping to slap a statue of what she and Hana call the “Governor.” He liked how happy Lena looked and left a secret note for her in the statue’s empty palm. Lena is stunned that he noticed her and afraid of her confusing feelings for Alex, which she tries to deny to herself because she is afraid of succumbing to the “disease.” Alex sees her fear and assures her that he is “safe” because he is cured. He and Lena dance and agree to meet each other the next night.

Lena lies to her aunt again and meets Alex at a secluded beach near the Wilds. She wonders who Alex is matched with and why he is showing an interest in her. They sit in the sand, and after a comfortable silence, Lena finds herself telling Alex about her past. She fears he will shun her because she comes from a “diseased” family, but he listens without judgment. They race each other out to buoys floating in the ocean, and Lena feels happy and safe.

When they talk about the Wilds, Alex confesses that he is not actually cured; the scars behind his ear were deliberately made to look like cure scars. When he reveals that he was born in the Wilds, Lena is shocked and upset. Alex tells her that he likes her and didn’t want to lie to her. Lena swims for the shore in fear and bikes back home.

Lena reveals more of her past in narration, explaining that before her older sister Rachel was cured, she fell in love with a boy named Thomas, succumbing to the disease and resisting the cure until it was finally forced upon her. Even though Rachel is less affectionate now, Lena knows that at least Rachel is safe from her past. Lena believes it is best to run from the past before it consumes you.

Over the next few weeks, Lena is paranoid that she is diseased after her brief experience with Alex but reassures herself that she is fine. She runs to the Governor statue and finds a new note from Alex begging for her forgiveness, but she ignores it. Because she feels guilty for her illegal actions, Lena becomes a model niece and citizen. She receives a strong eight out of ten on her second evaluation; she also receives her approved husband matches, her college, and her assigned career. She numbly goes through the motions of ranking her matches and is officially pledged to a boy named Brian Scharff.