My Family Divided: One Girl's Journey of Home, Loss, and Hope

“My parents came here as immigrants to make sure I had opportunities that weren’t available in Colombia.”

Like many others, Diane’s parents came to the US because they believed it would offer their children a better life. Throughout her memoir, Guerrero writes about her parents, their struggles, and their personalities, in an effort to humanize undocumented immigrants and dispel the view of them as an outsider or a threat.

“She prayed her son, my brother, would have a better life. One that was free of the tragedies she and Papi had suffered.”

Diane’s Mami set a legacy of Using Trauma As Fuel for Hope of a Brighter Future by making the courageous decision to move to the US. Guerrero emphasizes that her goal was to provide better opportunities and a safer environment for her son and, later, for her daughter.

“For the first time, I realized that with one phone call, I could lose the most important people in the world to me.”

Guerrero points to the vulnerable and fragile state that she and her family, as well as others like them, live in day to day. As a child, she had this realization when her mother told her that calling the police might lead to her parents being taken away. Guerrero presents this moment as one of disillusionment and incipient adult responsibility, foreshadowing the later breakup of the family unit.

“I placed a tight lid over the top of my dreams and hid them away. But, like fireflies, their light still burned inside me.”

For most of her life until this point, Diane kept her emotions, her dreams, and her family’s status a secret. Through the adversity she experienced, she never let go of her vision of a future as a performing artist. Guerrero uses simile to compare this passion to a firefly burning inside her, symbolizing its persistence and positivity.

“My Papi. My haven. My anchor. The caretaker whose arms I rested in, whose shoulder I leaned on. The father who worked so tirelessly before the sun even came out, to provide me with a childhood that was far happier than his own.”

Diane’s admiration for her Papi is clear, and she wants to make it known that undocumented immigrants like her Papi are some of the strongest and bravest people there are. Their willingness to do whatever it takes for their children speaks to a selflessness that knows no bounds. Diane’s relationship with her father was severed when he was suddenly deported, and it took years for her to rebuild it. This significant change demonstrates The Strengths and Fragilities of Familial Bonds.

“There are few things scarier than when adults, your protectors, the ones who make you feel better, are afraid, too.”

When Diane’s Mami was taken for the first time, Diane witnessed the fear and sadness in her father and knew that he could not protect her or himself from what just happened to his wife. It brings a new sense of realism to something she always knew deep down—that her family was not safe.

“I think both of us were secretly hoping she’d magically reappear, as she had before. But months came and went, and summer stretched into fall. No Mami.”

This passage shows Diane’s realization that she is living through a time of crucial change. Guerrero’s description is an example of how the memoir combines the child and adult perspectives. Living with such uncertainty brought anxiety into her life, and reliving those memories as an adult left her with depression and a feeling of hopelessness.

“It’s funny how somewhere you’ve never been before can already feel like home.”

Guerrero’s use of the word “home” is significant here. The memoir shows how the concept of “home” is conflicted for immigrant families, especially those experiencing deportation and family division. Left without a family home, Diane has been forced to find a place for herself in the US. She finds this through the performing arts, and “home” here becomes a metaphor for her personal process of finding belonging and acceptance.

“Strong? I felt like the wind had been kicked out of me. I felt weak and here I was, alone and abandoned.”

Diane’s Papi asked her to be strong after he was detained and she was left on her own. Diane’s entire existence and sense of reality was altered in a single moment, and yet her father demanded strength from her. It was not until Diane began counseling that she finally felt validated in her sadness and anger toward her parents (especially her mother) for what happened to her as a child. Guerrero again presents the child’s experience with an adult perspective, showing how she was asked to take on adult responsibility.

“Being strong is necessary; it helps you move forward and keeps you brave. But honoring your true feelings is necessary, too, and mine were sadness, fear, and loneliness.”

Guerrero humanizes herself and makes genuine attempts to relate to her reader while also encouraging them to approach what they are experiencing in a healthy way. Diane knows what it is like to be told not to cry and to be forced to take care of herself; she does not want anyone else to feel like their emotions are invalid. This is part of the Importance of Education on Immigration Issues, because it acts as advice for children and youth who may be told they too need to be strong in the face of losing their loved ones.

“Weeks earlier, my mami had simply been the loving mother who combed my long black hair into a ponytail. The mom who made sure I brushed my teeth and finished my homework. Then in one afternoon, Mami had suddenly been labeled a prisoner. A ‘detainee.’ And in less than one hour, she’d be forced out of the country.”

Guerrero comments on how quickly and suddenly undocumented immigrants are dehumanized and separated from their loved ones. This emphasizes the human impact it has on those who are affected, in an area where political and social discourse is often highly impersonal and ideological.

“My parents’ deportation had made a mini adult out of me.”

This passage shows that Diane was forced to grow up quickly when her parents were deported. Although she had friends to take care of her, she did not have her parents or any sort of security, solid foundation, or place to call her home. She became independent and strong, and learned to use her trauma as motivation for success.

“I peered out again over the scores of faces, praying that, by some miracle, I’d spot Mami and Papi. Amid the bright lights and magic of the stage, the impossible seemed possible, even for the briefest of moments.”

When Diane performed on stage and her parents were not there to see it, it was like a part of her was missing. The joy of the moment and of her accomplishment overcame her, and she knew that only having her parents there could have made it better. This passage is an example of the memoir’s motif of familial loss and regret, even in times of happiness and success.

“Avoidance was easier than looking at the distance between us in the face.”

Diane spent years of her life avoiding communication with her parents as much as possible and did not see them for seven years. Although she missed them horribly, they began to feel almost like strangers to her, and being with them reminded her of everything she missed out on by losing them as a teenager. This speaks to how familial bonds can be damaged by deportation.

“I felt as if my own mother and father were foreigners to me, people I’d perhaps known in a former life but whom I did not recognize anymore. Facing that was devastating.”

This passage is an example of Guerrero’s direct narrative voice and her presentation of self-reflection. Here, she considers how it took her several years to accept the truth about how she felt and about how her life had been forever altered by her parents’ deportation. This realization is part of the memoir’s message of personal strength and hope.

“I owed them more than this. They’d paid too great a price for me to throw my life away so senselessly.”

This passage is an exploration of the human instinct for survival, and the lasting recognition which Diane has for her parents’ efforts, even though their decisions have not always caused her happiness. This episode is an emotional turning-point in the narrative, after which Diane is able to drive her life forward with positivity.

“It’s hard to predict how deeply people can affect us.”

Diane’s experiences with Lorraine allowed her to accept and love herself, as well as find the courage to pursue her dream career. While Guerrero speaks of Lorraine in this comment, she also speaks of a wider experience that has followed her throughout her life.

“Since childhood, I was in the habit of keeping secrets, whether it was protecting my family’s status or safeguarding my dreams.”

Diane spent most of her life keeping everything about her life and herself a secret and underwent a total shift in her life which allowed her to find the confidence to not only share her story, but to become a talented actor and advocate for human rights.

“Standing to the side wasn’t my thing. I was like, Are you kidding me, boo? I’m an artiste. I did not, repeat not, want to be a so-called background artist.”

Guerrero’s writing style fully reveals her voice, personality, and attitude through the words she uses and the regular inclusion of asides and reflections that make it seem as though she is telling her story to an old friend. At this point in her life, Diane was gaining confidence in her talents and began to fight for starring roles.

“With a heart still burdened from loss and grief, Mami mustered the courage, with Eric on her hip, to set out for a foreign land.”

Upon reconciling with her mother, Guerrero can finally come to a place of pure admiration, free of resentment and heartache, for the person who made the decision to raise her children in the US. She recognizes the sacrifices, bravery, and sheer will of the human spirit that it takes to do something so terrifying.

“Over time, learning to accept myself—my difficult past, my off-the-wall habits, my true desires—allowed me to believe that others might accept me, too. That I didn’t need to hide. That I, like every single person on this planet, deserved love, support, and kindness.”

Through the performing arts and her sessions with Lorraine, Diane learned to love herself and recognize herself as deserving. This personal journey of self-compassion and humanization mirror’s the memoir’s wider message that immigrants should be treated with similar humanity by society.

“All these people were here, experiencing what I’d suffered through all along. The more I heard and read, the clearer it became that this was about something much bigger than just my family’s tragedy. Millions were living under the radar, ashamed, just as I had been. They, too, deserved a voice.”

After finding the courage to share her story publicly for the first time, Guerrero started to receive messages and support from others with similar experiences. She realized that it was in her power to help inspire more people to come forward with their own stories and find their own courage to speak out. This passage forms part of Guerrero’s manifesto and her presentation of herself as a person with a responsibility to use her public platform.

“No one should be torn away from their loved ones—nor should a child be left trembling alone beneath a bed.”

Guerrero hopes for a brighter future in which children of undocumented immigrant parents do not need to fear losing their families overnight nor deal with the consequences of that loss. She has experienced the level of damage that can be caused and how familial bonds can nearly be broken by these acts against humanity.