The Flatshare

Content Warning: The source text and this guide include discussion of emotional abuse and manipulative behavior in relationships.

The amount of patience, work, and time required to recover from emotional abuse is an important theme in The Flatshare. At the beginning of the novel, Tiffy has barely begun the process: She is in denial that what she went through was abuse at all, even after supportive friends name it as such. It takes time, support from her friends, and professional therapy for her to work out and understand the damage that Justin did to her self-esteem and sense of physical safety.

For months after their breakup, Tiffy experiences flashbacks and memories of his mistreatment—she calls these “rememberings” at first—that she had forgotten or repressed. These flashbacks confuse her at first, especially because they affect her physically as well as emotionally: “It’s very hard to describe this feeling. Panic, perhaps, but then I’m completely immobile and feel strangely passive” (237). Every time she gets closing to having an intimate physical relationship with another man, her body freezes out of self-preservation. Through her interactions with her friends and later a therapist, Lucie, all of whom point out Justin’s abuse frankly and frequently and validate Tiffy’s feelings, she realizes that she is not actually stupid, forgetful, and bad at figuring out directions; Justin just made her feel that way so she’d think she needed him.

The fact that Leon’s mother had similar experiences helps show the prevalence of this kind of abuse and the different ways it impacts the victims and their families. As an older woman, Leon’s mother illustrates how unhealthy patterns can play out over time and that it thus takes longer to break the cycle. As Leon helps Tiffy navigate the recovery process, he realizes that his mother also needs patience, compassion, and encouragement. His mother also benefits from working through her experiences with a professional.

The novel illustrates emotional abuse and the long recovery process in a way that is sensitive to those who have experienced similar treatment but also informs readers as well; while Tiffy realizes that she has been a victim of abuse and learns about concepts such as “gaslighting,” so too do readers. Mo and Gerty model supportive friendships, while characters such as Martin are examples of enablers of abuse. Leon shows what a loving partner and healthy relationship can look like as an alternative to Justin. Overall, O’Leary approaches this serious theme sensitively and without making light of it while still infusing the story and characters with humor.